An Open Letter

Unlike most open letters that I have read on the web I am writing this one with a genuine desire to reach out to as many people as possible. The purpose is more to educate than just vent and I am hoping that people actually embrace the idea. Let me get straight to the point.

America, STOP STINKING UP MOVIE THEATERS WITH THE DISGUSTING AND OVERWHELMING SMELL OF POPCORN. A cinema is not a restaurant. Have a meal before or after the movie. Heck, have a meal before AND after. Can't you go just 2 hours without stuffing your face with food? It is bad enough that most of you pollute the air inside the theater with the nauseating smell of overpriced butter, but oh my god, the LOUD CHEWING AND THE SLURPING. Who does that? Did your mother teach you that it is not okay to make noises while eating or drinking except in a goddamn theater? Do you all need a special message at the beginning of the movie that asks you to switch off your cellphones and your animal instincts?

There are some who might say I am overreacting. If you agree, then you are one of those people who is pissing me off and YOU ARE A MORON. Do you always have to buy a tub of popcorn and a large diet coke everytime you see a movie? Stop behaving like a conditioned drone and know that just because it is dark and no one can see you doesn't mean you can check your manners at the door and behave like a 2 year old. Everyone doing it does not make it ok. You all disgust me and make me want to avoid going to movies altogether!